Joss Whedon's ex-wife slams director as a hypocrite 'preaching feminist ideals'

Ausiliatrice Cristiano
Agosto 21, 2017

In a guest blog for The Wrap, Kai Cole - who separated from Joss in 2012 after 16 years of marriage - accuses the 53-year-old director of multiple affairs and suggests he's a hypocrite for "preaching feminist ideals".

"'When I was running "Buffy, ' I was surrounded by attractive, needy, aggressive young women".

Whether it's deserved or not is debatable, but Joss Whedon has a reputation for being a feminist writer/director who has a particular penchant for strong, well-rounded female characters. He said he admired and respected females, he didn't lust after them.

Now however, Cole has written a blog post in which she reveals that Whedon went to hide "multiple affairs and a number of inappropriate emotional ones that he had with his actresses, co-workers, fans and friends", after having his first affair on the set of the WB programme; when he told her, in a letter, he admitted that it was because he was "surrounded by attractive, needy, aggressive young women". I believed him and trusted him. It felt like I had a disease, like something from a Greek myth. "On the set of 'Buffy, ' Joss chose to have his first secret affair", revealed Cole, who says Whedon admitted to having multiple affairs with women on and off the set of his shows. Suddenly I am a powerful producer and the world is laid out at my feet and I can't touch it, ' Cole claims Whedon's letter read. "He said he understood, "I would have to lie - or hide some part of the truth - for the rest of my life, ' but he did it anyway, hoping that first affair, 'would be ENOUGH, that THEN we could move on and outlast it".

She went on to say that Whedon opened up about his unfaithful behavior in a written message that he gave her when he was "done" with their marriage - 15 years after that first act of infidelity - and told her he'd kept several affairs with "actresses, co-workers, fans and friends" secret from her over the course of the next decade and a half.

Cole said that Whedon never conceded the hypocrisy of preaching about feminism while taking away her own right to self-determination.

The Mary Sue, which published an essay that questioned Whedon's feminism in 2011, is among many fan-oriented publications asking whether Whedon's feminism is real or not in the wake of Cole's revelations. "I want the people who worship him to know he is human, and the organisations giving him awards for his feminist work, to think twice in the future about honouring a man who does not practice what he preaches".

And she finally wants to take back her narrative. "But no matter what happens, or how people interpret this statement, I no longer have to carry the burden of Joss' long-term deceit and confessions". I'm sorry she had to put up with this so quietly for so long, and I hope speaking up will help her heal.

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